Lovely words! the excerpt you picked out is one of my favourites as well. Perhaps, the reflection on the source can be more directive, you list a lot of terms using commas, however, expanding on these ideas and romanticising them would be a pleasure to read and relate to the theme of your piece nicely.
For example:
“shine a light on issues that are kept in the dark and be the voice for those who can not speak for themselves”… such as in “the Man” when you successfully portray the brutality and horror of a lynching. Through the metaphor of “held death on a leash” you depict the immense superiority of the corrupt nature of the power white people “hold” over the African Americans. This horror also creates an allusion to death of traditional African American Culure in America which continues to be an issue today.
Great writing!
in relation to a letter to Baldwin.
Victoria Martin's Literature Blog 